Editing is nice.
The video is enticing to the storyline, and the editing is fairly understandable. It seems to me that you would benefit from taking a life drawing class, because you have your characters' images down, but the drawing level is still at an early stage. There are also how-to drawing books at local art stores. I think you have a lot of potential, and this advice isn't to put you down. I only spend this much time commenting to somebody whom I think could end up being a really good artist and storyteller. :)